The Year That Was: 2010

As we come to the end of the year, I look back at the incidents in my life and those of my friends.

Feb 2010: Femmo said she will be gone for a week to improve her IQ up to 90. She has not yet returned.

Mar 2010: A friend went to her mayke (mother's place) for childbirth. She went a little early (before her pregnancy was confirmed). She is still there.

Apr 2010: A friend promised (by mistake) to walk in rain everyday for the rest of her life.

May 2010: A die hard communist friend told me that her child didn't resemble her. I said maybe her husband cheated and maybe she wasn't the real mother. She went and accused her husband. And... Well the rest of the incident was very ugly.

Jun 2010: Friend's mom returned to Calcutta from US. Her father, who in the mother's absence handled the kitchen portfolio, handed over custody and responsibility of the kitchen to her mother.

Jul 2010: A friend went to the beach to get tanned and came back whiter than before. She plans to sell this wonder cure called Albulgu to dark skinned people.

Aug 2010: A friend got her driver's license in Australia after a record 83^rd attempt. She is a shining example of how our perseverance can frustrate the Motor Vehicles Department.

Sep 2010: A friend went on serious dieting. She is writing a book on dieting which will find favor with people who want to gain weight.

Another friend started taking tennis lessons. I explained the importance of proper breathing while serving; whether we should breathe before or during or after serving. She has been double faulting ever since.

Oct 2010: I informed the Polish parliament of the consequences of the indiscriminate use of the letter Z. Even now, cities like SZSZSCZCZNIN show scorn towards the new Z reduction policy being promulgated. Embittered by this, Switzerland and Norway have refused to join the EU. Friends from Poland showed solidarity with me by actively avoiding the use of Z. Dieki.

Nov 2010: Juice paid $100 to an escort to get math lessons.

Dec 2010: A friend got a job as a photographer. Details of what she would pay her employer are being ironed out. I explained to her the theory of money. That in any transaction the person who enjoys the transaction always pays and the one who supposedly doesn't enjoy gets paid.

Blondie friend baked a cake for her best friend. Subsequently they are not on talking terms.

Bjubos explained to me that Julian calendar (followed by Orthodox Christians) lags Gregorian calendar (followed by most everyone) by 13 days. So orthodox people get Jan 1st on Jan 14th, if you know what I mean.
She told me her sons come and stay at her house every weekend. She visits her parents every weekend. She said she hasn't met her sons in a long time and wondered why.

Hmm. Just a normal year.

Dal Lake In Kashmir

Today I came across a photo (http://hindu.com/2010/12/28/stories/2010122852210300.htm) of a frozen lake in Chennai.

Incidentally this is a summer time picture of the same lake: http://www.kashmir-houseboats.com/s_dal_lake1.jpg.

Beautiful isn't it? Well actually the lake is not in Chennai. It's in Kashmir.

The Polyester Prince: The Rise of Dhirubhai Ambani

This is an interesting book by Hamish Mcdonald. As I understand the author didn't have much access to Ambani while writing this book. In that way it is similar to Ben Mezrich's biography "The Accidental Billionaires" on Mark Zuckerberg (of Facebook fame). The Ambanis are richer than Zuckerberg.

The Polyester Prince gives an interesting glimpse into the world of finance, industry and politics at the highest levels in India. Apparently the book is banned in India. 

Update (23 Oct 2011): http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/business/india-business/Reliance-used-Swan-as-a-mask-Judge/articleshow/10458068.cms. 

Merry Christmas

http://ak.imgag.com/imgag/product/preview/flash/bws8Shell_fps24.swf?ihost=http://ak.imgag.com/imgag&brandldrPath=/product/full/el/&cardNum=/product/full/ap/3166187/graphic1

Multi Talking

Today I was watching a woman who was lying across on a bed with only her forehead, knees and toes touching the bed. A strange pose. She was on the phone (actually 2 phones). While she was listening on one, she was talking on the other and vice versa. Moving her face from left to right and then right to left like a pendulum. The forehead was like a fulcrum. I was astounded. How could one do that (I mean how could one talk like that on 2 phones)?

And after some time I figured it out. 

A feminine conversation has a certain grammar to it..

It consists of the following phrases

1. I hate you

2. Its chooo chweeet (baby language for "so sweet")

3. I know it because I know it.

4. Didn't you know? She is pregnant. 

5. Isn't she an angel?

6. Oh her dress. Ugghhh

7. I want a chocolate. NOW
8. I want to die.
9. Giggle and/or whisper and/or squeal.

and so on. These may be uttered in response to any question, be it on weather or politics or any other subject.

This loose coupling between a question and its answer is what makes this multi tas(l)king possible. 

I am happy I have found the solution.

Laptops and India

I saw a couple of posts which were really funny.

Usage of Laptops

About India - a good collection of FAQ.

And about Hell.

Old Home Made Remedies for Ailments

I read this article (http://www.sukravathanee.org/forum1/viewtopic.php?f=138&t=14291&p=74756#p74756) on home made remedies. I liked it, though I do not know whether each remedy is effective, but certainly worth trying. 

A Cool Tablet Cum Phone

I had earlier mentioned about the changes in way we search and how we communicate. How Google and mobile phone have radically modified our lives. http://vbala99.blogspot.com/2010/10/google-search-and-mobiles-how-our-lives.html.

I have been reading about tablets and smartphones etc. But none of them has the features that I would love.

I expect this device (is it a tablet or a phone?) to have the features of a phone, have a good camera, it should be portable like a paperback book. It should be rugged like a phone. You just pick up a phone and go out, you don't pick up a laptop and walk out, not without a carrying case. Not especially if it's raining. And you would be worried about dust when you take a laptop to the park. You don't worry about using a phone in the park. 

So I want this device to be rugged like a phone. Have a battery charge that lasts 4 days comfortably, giving a talk time of 4 hours. 

And of course I should be able to edit MS Office documents in it, apart from watching videos/movies. Editing should be easy, note that the device may not have a keyboard. And it should be 8"-10" (20mm to 25mm) in size. 

Basically I want a tablet which I can use to work (edit) extensively with MS office documents, watch videos, have access to the net and also use as a telephone. It should be rugged enough that I can put it in my pocket take it to the park and work for a few hours without any strain. And it should have LONG battery life.

Whew, I think those are what I want. Not one of the phones /tablets seemed to cover what I wanted. Until I read about the Olive tablet today http://www.olivetelecom.in/laptop/olivepad/features.html. Some reviews are given in http://www.olivetelecom.in/laptop/olivepad/reviews.html

Some reviews have compared this favorably with the Samsung Galaxy Tab and the Apple IPAD. The latter two are far more expensive and apparently more stylish. Apple IPAD doesn't support flash nor MS Office documents.

Now this one tablet (based on the specifications seems to have all that I want). Sure the battery is not adequate, the RAM and hard disk and processor are inadequate. While it talks about a Doc Whiz for editing MS documents, I don't know how easy it is to use that.

Having said that, the Olive tablet seems to have all the features that I want. In another couple of years, they (Olive or someone else) will get the specs right. And my dream tablophone will be out there in the market. Yipeeee.

About Chennai

I was reading an article in the newspaper today

(http://www.hindu.com/fr/2010/12/10/stories/2010121050420100.htm) about women from Europe living in Chennai learning Indian dancing (an art that is more than 1000 years old).

It then struck me. How many Koreans, Europeans live here in Chennai. How often I have seen people with blonde hair shopping near my house or going for a walk. How many times I have seen a European woman bicycling with her child sitting in a baby seat in the back of the cycle.

In the last 15 years, Chennai (Nee Madras) has seen so many changes. I remember Elliots Beach which was far less crowded than it is now.

There used to be a time 40 years back when people from Madras went to Bombay, Delhi, Calcutta or to UK/USA etc in search of a living. Now I find so many people from north India living here. Especially the ones in the mid to late 30s who would hate to go back to their native places in north India.

And now we have people from outside India living here in Chennai and loving it here. Though I don't know any foreigner living in Chennai, I understand that they enjoy being here. 

Chennai has come a long way.

And what about India. Last month Mr Obama visited India and went back with $10 billion in business from India which apparently will create 55,000 jobs in the USA. Last week Mr Sarkozy visited India with his wife (whose hair color varied with occasion, I thought) and he went back to France with quite a few deals (aircrafts etc). (And he gave a speech in French which I was not quite able to follow; probably he doesn't speak French well.)

Of course India also would have benefited from these visits. Again I can't help but think that India too has come a long way. From that day in early 1990's when there was no foreign exchange left and India had to hock a couple of tons of gold to UK in order to get "working foreign exchange capital".

Hmmm.

Blonde Hair

I have been fascinated by blonde (well actually red more than yellow) hair for decades now. While I tend to stare stupidly at a blonde person, I don't like it when people dye their hair blonde or red or whatever. And I was irritated with myself that I couldn't find out whether the hair color was natural or dyed.

A friend explained the secret to me. Look at the eyebrows. Eyebrow color (in the case of men look at the hair in the hand or legs), should match the color of hair. 

The other day I was talking to a friend who had sent me a lovely video of 2 children performing. But I saw too many women having blonde hair and it seemed unnatural to me. 

Then I started to dig deeper into blonde hair. Of course we all know Scandinavians usually (apparently more than three fourths) have blonde hair. Blonde hair also seems very common in the northern parts of England. France, Spain, Portugal, Italy while the Balkan nations have a much lower incidence (less than 20%) of blonde hair. Between 20 and 50% people in the rest of Europe have blonde hair. The friend, who sent me the video, explained this to me though not with the percentage figures. 

Here is a very good visual picture of prevalence of blonde hair in Europe. http://bigthink.com/ideas/21266. What is surprising is that people in North Africa, Asia and the Kalash tribe in Pakistan (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blond - see picture of blonde Berber man from North Africa and of Kurdish children,
http://www.flickr.com/photos/rashidctl/3474061080/in/faves-45816934@N07/, http://s720.photobucket.com/albums/ww205/haas_bucket/?action=view&current=448517003_aaec024435_b.jpg the last two pictures show children from Kalash tribe I think) and apparently some Kashmiris (Indian) also have blonde hair though in smaller proportions.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1917348/posts - see the Kashmiri blonde kid. Never knew this! 

Today I read an article about Russian (and Ukrainian) women resorting to selling their blonde hair due to economic conditions there. There seems to be a big market for blonde hair. Apparently a 16 inch (40cm) length of blonde hair fetches $50.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/22/business/global/22blond.html?_r=1. 

White people are normally referred to as Caucasians. And the Caucasus region is in Russia, Georgia to be more precise. And these mountains are apparently at the border of Europe and Asia. Wonder why the term Caucasian has been used to denote people with white skin.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caucasus_Mountains
And all that I knew till now was that you could either be naturally blonde or bright. Whew.

Real Men - My Take

A friend passed this to me. I liked the "real man" so much that I am reproducing it here.

"

10 Reasons why men are so lovable!

On International Men's Day let us women raise a toast to all the men who have touched our lives in some way, big or small.

Reasons why women must celebrate the men who love us - be it our fathers, teachers, grandfathers, brothers, boyfriends, husbands, sons or friends.

1. They always keep us on a pedestal by having great expectations from us - of understanding football, cricket , going out clubbing yet being the demure petite 'bahu' (daughter in law) at all the family dos and being absolute devils in bed! 

2. Once they love us they cannot delete us from their systems although our loyalties might keep switching between our fathers, boyfriends, husbands and sons all our lives!

3. He tries his best to surprise us although his surprise might put us in an absolute state of shock!

4. Though most of us feel that men can very rarely be as sensitive as us, it's just we on the contrary who need to understand that their ways of being sensitive are manly else they'd be just like us and oh wouldn't that make the world so boring?

5. They can really hold secrets and even forget them conveniently! Don't expect him to remember the colleague you bitched about the other day to him!

6. He might never be our 'best friend' but in spite of being impatient and short tempered with the world around he really tries to be a patient listener.

7. He might not be the 'knight in shining armor' out of our dreams but he can pamper us with all his love.

8. They are babies at heart, they respect us, can't do without us but will never admit it or praise women!

9. They are born loyal- ever heard a man who forgets his ma-ke-haath-ka-khaana?

10. They always want to be heroic, no matter where they are in spite of all their flaws just to impress us women!

"

wowowow. Very nice if possibly exaggerated!

Another nice one which caught my fancy was http://www.funtoosh.com/jokes/men/366. It made my day.