Monday, May 23, 2011

FhAQ (Frequently Asked Questions By New Brides In My Friend's Family)

Where is the bedroom? Its only 6 mins walk from the hall. There is a guided tour of the house on the 10th of every month. Even long time residents of the house tend to forget what is where.

Where do I buy good walking shoes? No. Our women don't walk outside the house. Go by car. We have 3 cars and 2 drivers. Its easier to purchase a car than a driver. And you can always walk from the hall to the bedroom. Its a long walk anyway.

How frequently can I go shopping? As often as you wish. Just make sure there is one spare driver left for the menfolk.

What if I am tired and I dont feel like cooking? Just say "Ouiii ma, pet mein sardard hai" ("Ooooh I have a headache in my stomach"). We split the housework among the daughters in law, each taking turns. If you still cant manage, introduce up to three cute woman to your husband. 

How frequently can I go to mayke (mother's house)? Anytime you get pregnant.

How frequently can I get pregnant? Make sure it doesn't exceed twice a year. And you, your daughter in law and mother in law shouldn't all get pregnant at the same time. It causes a little problem for the household. if you don't want more children but still want to enjoy maternity benefits you can avail the Surrogate NM scheme. We have a family consultant in Chennai who will provide the details. (http://calmisc.blogspot.com/2011/03/a-new-business-model-snm.html)

Can I go sleeper class (2nd class by train) to mayke? No problem. But if you do travel sleeper class, we don't expect you to come back. Its TTT. We have a season pass in all Rajdhani trains. Just call the railway minister's office and the tickets will be reserved for you.

What is the telephone number of the railway minister's office? Its 1-800-Oh-Mayke.

What other fringe benefits am I entitled to? All women get RC (Rakshazi club) membership.

Welcome to our household. The only place where it's always party or wedding or engagement or pregnancy time.

1 comment:

  1. rofl rooopsfellonthefloorholdingmytummy!!!
    Yesterday morning my nephew..(80 yrs old) he was going to go to the
    stationary to buy the charts for the kids project assignments. There
    was no driver (sunday) he is 17, knows driving, but not allowed. The
    shop is even nearer than CBKM's mayke.. Maybe 150 mtrs. My husband got
    annoyed..and said,' bagal mein hai kya, how will you go?' implying
    that you cant take the car and neither can you walk THAT FAR. All of
    us, including my sil gaped at him, and we all said in unision... Aur
    kitna bagal mein hona chahiye ("how much closer should it be?")!!!!


    God god god
    i cant stop lol!!

    ReplyDelete

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